At its essence, the Etiquette of a Lawyer is very simple – here, there and everywhere but still nowhere.
The slight golden tinge sparkles in the sun, making the deep, rich metallic green literally scream for attention. No one could expect a lawyer to be this venturesome in broad daylight. They say that lawyers are supposed to be active only at their desks, don’t they? Steady, grounded, methodical—traits that come to mind when you think of someone in the legal profession. But here I am, in something bold and beautiful, far removed from the image of a bookish, buttoned-up lawyer.
The colour is called Belgravia Green, named after the affluent district of Central London. It evokes the images of wealth and refinement—where the grand homes are tucked behind wrought-iron gates, and the streets echo with the hum of high-powered deals and quiet luxury. Bankers, lawyers, royals, and heirs—each with their chauffeur, gliding through the most expensive streets of London for business and pleasure. It makes very much sense, and no one would pay attention to a lawyer or two. The connection is natural, seamless even. But here, in the Nordics, the scene is different. The 2022 Range Rover Autobiography LWB, the long-wheelbase model, stands out in a way that draws eyes wherever it goes. And there aren’t many of them around yet—perhaps only a handful.
I’ve never been much of an attention seeker, but when I look at the heads turning on this beautiful sunny day, I must admit, the LWB commands attention. It moves through the streets like a shadow, gliding effortlessly and making its presence known without ever seeming to try. It moves with a grace that belies its size, a true chameleon—sometimes a bold statement, other times a quiet observer. The long wheelbase lends an air of dominance, but it is elegant, refined, almost regal. The LWB feels like a floating oasis, above the noise and the bustle of the world. The tinted windows are a quiet shield from prying eyes. And when I want to disappear completely, there’s a button for electric rear sunblinds that provide the ultimate escape. Once the sunblinds rise, it isn’t just me vanishing from view; the entire world outside becomes a blur. The bustling streets, the curious onlookers—they all fade away, muted and distant. And if you can’t see, you shouldn’t hear it either. That’s why the headrests are equipped with active noise cancellation. There is no need to be disturbed by the sound of the outside world.
Today, the sunblinds stay down. It’s Sunday, and the Meridian audio system plays soft morning jazz—a perfect soundtrack for the leisurely pace of the day. I stretch my back slightly, adjusting my position in the seat, and try to decide which type of massage to choose. The possibilities are as vast as the horizon, but in this moment, I just need something gentle, soothing. The vibrations ease the tension from a long week, as the car hums quietly around me.
“Chauffeur, please head to the closest grocery store. There are no beverages in the refrigerator.” I say it casually, as if it’s a simple request, but the undertone is one of ease, comfort, and the effortless nature of being carried through life. After a slight nod from the driver’s seat, the steering wheel turns calmly, guiding us through the quiet streets.
This isn’t London, or any other metropolis for that matter. I think to myself as I gently crawl out of the comfortable back seat. There are no stares, no photographers lurking in the shadows, only interested, curious glances from the passersby. It’s a strange feeling—being the object of attention but not being on display. Outside the vehicle, I feel more exposed to the world. The glances, the sounds of people chatting, the distant rumble of traffic, even the bright sun pressing down from above. It’s all part of life outside the fortress of the LWB. Aren’t other people supposed to do the groceries for you? It’s just a few drinks, I tell myself. A simple task, really. I walk toward the entrance of the store, trying to ignore the subtle feeling of being watched, of standing out in a way I hadn’t anticipated.
For those who crave attention, the moments of getting in and out of the LWB must be the highlight. But I try my best to remain invisible, like a ghost moving through the world, unnoticed, unbothered. But aren’t those moments exactly when paparazzi manage to catch celebrities in their most vulnerable state? The act of getting in or out of a car, an otherwise mundane task, becomes an event in the public eye.
Inside the LWB, under the protection of the tinted windows, my thoughts occasionally wander to the experiences that life has to offer to those who stay humble, grounded, and keep motivated. There’s something to be said for the balance of power and humility, of wealth and wisdom. But what is it that makes Jaguar Land Rover so irresistible, so trusted that even royals swear by it? The answer is simple, really. Land Rover defines the SUV segment the way Porsche defines the sports car segment—there is no need to explain why you’re in one. The reputation of the brand does it for you. Whether you’re driving a base model or the upmarket Range Rover, it speaks volumes without a single word needing to be spoken.
There truly is something majestic about sitting in the backseat of an LWB. The combination of your chauffeur, the vast legroom, the comfortable Caraway perforated SemiAniline leather seats, and a cold drink waiting in the refrigerator creates an experience that’s difficult to match. Add a massage on top of all that, and you’ve reached a level of comfort and luxury that most people only dream of. You are in a statement—a declaration of elegance, power, and sophistication. The world notices. The world stares. But inside the car, you are at peace, cocooned in the finest luxury this world has to offer.
But you could expect this to be the end of the show. Not a chance. Luxury becomes ultra-luxury when you add two extra letters, S and V, to the badge – SVAutobiography.
The Etiquette of a Lawyer has only begun.